08.30.06

Wow.

Posted in Uncategorized at 4:42 pm by Anne

How sad is it that I care when some random blogger dumps me? I wish I didn’t care. It’s not like we were bff or bfirl or nothin’. But I have no idea what I said to piss her off.

sigh.

Do I say ‘fuck’ too much? Please forgive me.

Shit.

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08.29.06

Datura meletoides blossom

Posted in Uncategorized at 3:34 pm by Anne

Experimental macro using 50 mm f/1.4 lens, in reverse. Idea from Cecily, resident photographic wizard. 

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Pressure

Posted in Uncategorized at 3:22 pm by Anne

So one of the playgroup Mommies is pressing me to put Lily into dance lessons with her little girl. Shan and I both have mixed feelings about it. The cost factor is certainly significant since the whole preschool tuition is so astronomical. For sake of the argument, tho, let’s just say we had a million dollars thereby making the costs moot. Done and done.

I never learned to dance which is obvious by my distinct lack of dancing ability. If you remember the Elaine-dance from Seinfeld, that would be me. I grew up both scorning people who took lessons and feeling jealous that they were learning something foreign to me. My husband, on the other hand, was forced to learn dancing from his Mom…She did him a real service because he is so badass that he can make even me look good on the dance floor. Shouldn’t all southern gentlemen know how to dance after all?

The mixed feelings lay in setting Lily down a particular path. The dancer path. The dancer path that runs off to cheerleader, or hops over to drill team, or flits to ballet. Who are we to point her down that road? Shan asked, “Isn’t there a way we could let her do dance for three months and then put her into hockey or something?” His point being the priss factor. She is already more girly than I ever was/am…Won’t dance lessons make it even more pronounced?

This is probably pointless anyway, though. I have a feeling our resources will not be able to fund an additional 100 dollars a month hickey, so eff it. I’m just wondering what ya’ll with older children have done as far as extracurricular costly activities go. How do you choose? How can you be sure you are choosing the right one?

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08.28.06

rainflower

Posted in Uncategorized at 12:49 pm by Anne

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08.26.06

crazyhead

Posted in Uncategorized at 5:40 pm by Anne

School starts next week…Lily will attend twice while Em will get her first taste of once a week preschool. And yes, we will be taking out a second mortgage on the house to afford it but my sanity is worth it because for one day a week…for five whole hours, I will get a free pass. No kids. Just typing that makes my head swim. Oh and don’t remind me that the free pass expires in February when the third and final bun in the oven shows up, all warm and pink and crabbing. Im trying not to dwell on that too much because for a few months I will be free! FREE I tell you!

Maybe I’ll get a new mop bucket to really celebrate.

During ‘meet the teacher’ I met a few parents of the children in Emma’s class. We kind of sorted ourselves out to which day our kid was enrolled. People walked up, “Hi! I am so and so, is your screaming child on Mondays or Wednesdays?” That kind of a thing. Imagine how crappy it was when I decided one Mom in particular was very cool and that we might be pals at some point, our girls were on the same day and all, when another Mom walked up and said, “Are you Emma’s Mom? The teacher said she is on Fridays with my little Sullivan!” “Oh no, ” I assured her, “Emma is on Mondays.” For all of the summer so far I assumed Em was on Monday. I swore that is what I signed her up for, my first choice for crissakes! Then I walked outside the door to look on the registration log and felt my bowels loosen. There was Emma’s name, under the Friday class heading.

I walked up to the best teacher in the world and told her about my mistake and she very kindly asked, “Well, would you like me to walk with you to the director’s office so we can make sure?” There we went, all the way down crisscrossing hallways, jammed full of kids and parents and teachers…unbridled enthusiasm and joy, and I felt like a damn robot. A dazed, idiotic, stupider than stupid robot. At the director’s office, they pulled out my original sign-up sheet and sure enough, I had checked the box ‘first choice’ for Fridays.

Damn pregnant brain confusion. It’s like I took a crazy pill.
Again.

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08.24.06

dewdrops

Posted in Uncategorized at 3:05 pm by Anne

Man I need a 100mm lens. 

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Brokeback Toilet

Posted in Uncategorized at 2:48 pm by Anne

So a bathroom is out of commission due in no small part to my little helper Emma. There I was in her room, helping my sister feed the twins, when Lily walked in. “I went poop, Mommy!” she declared and fled the scene without answering as I called after her, “Did you flush honey? Go wash your hands!”

There was no answer so I assumed a log or two remained floating in the commode. “Emma,” I began, “would you please go and flush the toilet for me?” She nodded her heard earnestly, because she is a very serious little helper, and we watched her march into the bathroom. After a moment the sound of a flushing toilet sang out and Emma appeared triumphant. “Thanks Babe!” I smiled at her and forgot all about it.

Until later that night when my overactive and highly sensitive bladder woke me up. I found myself propped on the throne but where was the toilet paper? It was gone. At 2 AM there was no putting two and two together, I just assumed that Shan had commandeered the roll (as he sometimes does) to blow his nasty man-nose and had never returned it. So I got another roll and flushed. And I flushed again because the toilet was acting rather strange. The water level was all catty-wumpus…too low FLUSH…too high…FLUSH…totally effed up…FLUSH …

Then that old bad feeling crept up on me and I woke Shan. Something he absolutely hates more than, well, most anything. “um, Hon, I think something is wrong with the toilet.” He got up, took a look, flushed twice, cursed a lot more than I thought he would, and then told me the toilet would have to be physically disconnected from the floor that he’d have to run a snake and blablabla,he wasn’t going to do it at 2 in the morning, and I should have kept better watch of the kids, and blablablablabla…so we went back to bed and the toilet has been ignored ever since.

But I have a feeling this weekend will be the time he sets aside for some toilet shang-ri-la. Hey! Maybe Emma will help!

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08.23.06

lazy daze

Posted in Uncategorized at 8:26 am by Anne

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oh whoops.

Posted in Uncategorized at 7:30 am by Anne

So a few nights ago I attended the orientation night at the preschool. I sat through the tedious, windbag director’s intro and welcome, and leafed through the identical handbook we received last year before filing off to discrete classrooms to meet the teachers.

Lily’s new room was pleasant in that colorful, paper stapled to the wall, letters and numbers all over the place, kind of a way. I think this will be another good year for her, especially since two playgroup friends are also in the class. After filling out the necessary ‘get to know my child’ forms, and becoming completely irritated with a few of the parents (if the teacher says she prefers no peanut butter to be brought into the class that does not mean you should pipe up with “SO CAN I SEND PEANUT BUTTER AND CRACKERS WITH MY SON?”), it was time to visit Emma’s room.

Of course I was late but the teacher was very sweet and I could tell she was going to be perfect. Just very kind and loving and actually, she reminded me a little of Faith’s Mom. Again, no peanut butter was allowed for lunch or snack because there was a student w/ an allergy and who in the hell can keep 2 year olds from sharing food with each other? (I use the term ’share’ loosely.) At the end I wound up walking outside with the mom of the allergic child. She is a very small and thin woman, younger than me, and annoying in that self-absorbed way, where she asks the same question over and over again because she never listened to your answer the first few times…with big weepy blue eyes. Not pretty eyes, just weepy. Anyhow, after referring to her three children for the 18 hundredth time, I thought I’d somehow interject that I too was on the path to having three kids when I kinda effed the pooch in saying so. “Well, I’ve got a little ‘accident’ brewing…the due date is Valentine’s Day this year!” And you would have thought I had just suggested to her that we gangbang the church preacher together. Her weepy eyes reacted with the same kind of blatant dismay. Just like when she asked me if we were ‘members of the church.’ to which I replied with an honest no. You’d think if you were one of those super-judgmental people that you’d be a lot better at hiding it. You’d think.

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08.22.06

Pie

Posted in Recipes at 9:07 am by Anne

One of the better recipes I’ve come across. The Barefoot Contessa rulez.

Deep Dish Apple Pie

4 pounds Granny Smith apples, peeled, quartered, and cored
1 lemon, zested
1 orange, zested
2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice
1 tablespoon freshly squeezed orange juice
1/2 cup sugar, plus 1 teaspoon to sprinkle on top
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon kosher salt
3/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/8 teaspoon ground allspice
Perfect Pie Crust, recipe follows
1 egg beaten with 1 tablespoon water, for egg wash

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

Cut each apple quarter in thirds crosswise and combine in a bowl with the zests, juices, 1/2 cup sugar, flour, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg, and allspice.

Roll out half the pie dough and drape it over a 9- or 10-inch pie pan to extend about 1/2-inch over the rim. Don’t stretch the dough; if it’s too small, just put it back on the board and re-roll it.

Fill the pie with the apple mixture. Brush the edge of the bottom pie crust with the egg wash so the top crust will adhere. Top with the second crust and trim the edges to about 1-inch over the rim. Tuck the edge of the top crust under the edge of the bottom crust and crimp the 2 together with your fingers or a fork. Brush the entire top crust with the egg wash, sprinkle with 1 teaspoon sugar, and cut 4 or 5 slits.

Place the pie on a sheet pan and bake for 1 to 1 1/4 hours, or until the crust is browned and the juices begin to bubble out. Serve warm.

Perfect Pie Crust:
12 tablespoons (1 1/2 sticks) very cold unsalted butter
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1 tablespoon sugar
1/3 cup very cold vegetable shortening
6 to 8 tablespoons (about 1/2 cup) ice water

Dice the butter and return it to the refrigerator while you prepare the flour mixture. Place the flour, salt, and sugar in the bowl of a food processor fitted with a steel blade and pulse a few times to mix. Add the butter and shortening. Pulse 8 to 12 times, until the butter is the size of peas. With the machine running, pour the ice water down the feed tube and pulse the machine until the dough begins to form a ball. Dump out on a floured board and roll into a ball. Wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate for 30 minutes.

Cut the dough in half. Roll each piece on a well-floured board into a circle, rolling from the center to the edge, turning and flouring the dough to make sure it doesn’t stick to the board. Fold the dough in half, place in a pie pan, and unfold to fit the pan. Repeat with the top crust. 

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